How do you feel younger as you grow older?
NARENDER REDDY's surefire formula to reverse the process of aging!

“Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long time."- Daniel-Francois-Esprit Auber

I knew the title would draw your immediate attention. However, to those who think this column is about how to grow hair on your shining bald head or how to get those wrinkles out of your face, let me be honest- this column is not for you. This article is about how you could trick yourself into feeling younger, even as you grow older.

Aging has become a critical issue for all of us, despite the fact that the only alternative to aging is certain death. It is exciting to reach certain ages of life and depressing to reach others. Our children are excited to be 16, so that they can get a driving license, and drive on their own – the gateway to their ultimate freedom. Personally, I think, whoever introduced the legislation allowing 16-year-olds to be eligible for a driving license must have been totally stoned. Or else, the legislator must have lost his/her sanity. I truly believe that the qualifying age for a regular driving license must be at least 20. I envy these 16-year-olds enjoying the privileges of an adult, while their parents pay for their car loan and insurance payments and fervently pray for their safe return everyday.

Now, I can hear all you would be 16-year-olds sharpening your knives to hurt me. Hold on to those knives – my opinion has no power to stop your dreams – the law is law. As per current law, you are still allowed to get your license in the State of Georgia at age 16. Also per Georgia law, it is illegal for your parents to refuse to pay for your luxury car and its insurance. I was just kidding about that last bit….

Now, one may ask, what does a 16-year-old getting a driver’s license have anything to do with reverse aging? Frankly, nothing! I was just venting my frustrations at the experience of currently having a 16-year-old daughter in my household. 

Now, coming to the point of aging. Every one, whether you accept it honestly or not, feels depressed on the 50th birthday. You feel old now. Even if you don’t, all those ‘grateful children of ours’ would do everything possible, to make us feel old. Sometimes, after returning home after a tiring, hectic day at work, if I say, “maybe I am getting old”, one of my daughters taps me on my shoulder gently and says, “this may hurt your feelings, but, Dad, you are not getting old, YOU ARE OOOOOOOOLD.” Boy, these children really know how to lift your spirits!

Remember, when we were growing up back in India, on occasions when we did ‘pranam’ to our elders or on those very rare occasions when we would visit our priests at the temples, and they would bless us with ‘Shathaushman Bhava’, which means ‘may you live for a 100 years’. I haven’t been to India lately and I am not sure if anybody blesses in that manner any more. I guess these days; elders and priests alike, would be giving their blessings with a “one million dollars ‘prapthi rasthu’! 

To all those who are reading this column patiently, eager to enlighten themselves with my new formula for reverse aging, wait no more. Here is my Nobel Prize winning idea for reverse aging. 

Ok, let us assume that we will all live to celebrate our 100th birthday, as per the blessings of our elders and priests and assume the 50th birthday as the middle point of our lives. After reaching the 50th birthday, instead of counting our age in the progression of 51, 52 etc, let us start counting it backwards from the next birthday onwards (49, 48,47 and so on). Thus we could really reverse age and feel it, without going to a gym or through an extreme and expensive plastic surgery. After all, age is nothing but a number and you are as old or as young as you feel.

Compare your life, as you reverse back to stages that you have already experienced. When you reach 25 backwards (officially you are now 75 years old), once again you don’t have any job and no one wants to hire you. You are as confused as a real 25-year-old. You are as frustrated with your life as you were when you were 25. At this stage, here is a note of caution. Just because you reached 25 in reverse age, it doesn’t mean that you can expect to have your sex drive at its peak, like a real 25-year-old. Even if you do, keep the drive to yourself and don’t try it on your spouse please, or you may risk getting thrown out of the bedroom. Or worse still, your spouse may call the police alleging physical assault!
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"Every one, whether you accept it honestly or not, feels depressed on the 50th birthday. "

Let us assume that you live to be 100, which, according to my reverse calculations, is zero or equaling a new born. At this stage, you hardly have any hair on your head or any teeth in your mouth. You are like a newborn baby… for lack of large crib; you are now mostly lying in a bed or sitting in a wheel chair. 

Seriously, there is nothing fearful about aging as long as you learn to age with dignity. You can still make a difference in your life and the lives of others. You should take charge of your life by staying active, whether it's through volunteerism or indulgence in personal recreation; by relying on yourself as much as possible; by getting involved with others; and by putting your affairs in order with an honest self-awareness of the ultimate truth- that even the richest, most rewarding life comes to a close.

As for me, as I get older, my golf swing is getting better and I am hitting the ball further. However, to live for a 100 years is not a dream or an ambition of mine. I want to live only as long as I can swing a Golf club effectively. Does that make sense??? Bob Hope did live for a 100 years and played Golf almost till the end. I know, I am no Bob Hope… but there’s no harm in hoping, is there??

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